Youst a start of story. Worning. I don't writte so good in english so there will be errors. Don't be angry.Too much. And I'll post first chapter end later. I haven't finished it yet. Please, like it!

O.k… Here we go.

Chapter one- Begining for fighter

She fought to invisible fighter. Her blade weaved delicate and deadly dance. She was indeed skilled and powerful warrior, yet cursed with unholy strength and preternatural warrior. Some would say that this is a blessing. But in reality it was a curse, which follows in death.
As she fall on knees, her blood flowed from terrible wound in stomach, which she made to herself. She cried out laud, cursing faith, time and spirits to spare her daughter on this end.
‘’It is honorable death still, she deserve something better!’’ she said.
As life began to leave her dying body, Spirits heard her please, her last words. In last moments they appeared themselves to dying mother in a divine vision.
‘’ We will spare her from this death, but she’ll still die as young rose. This is you’re blessing and you’re course. It is meant like this, it is you’re duty, you’re last chance to find you’re peace.’’
With these words Sabriel’s mother soul flew away into space, to get last one breath of real freedom. She could run, she could fight, but she didn’t. She left herself to be swallowed in depth of memories, time and life. This was crossing where ruled only death and sorrow. There her skin from her right part of face started to go slowly off. It did not hurt her. Even this happen to her and more, her skin was pale and hard as a pristine white marble. More beautiful then before still, more deadly and terrifying in life. She felt no more. Only one more thing hurted her more than her deadly wound, which pain was disappearing. Her daughter scream, which was heard even in death itself. Tear slipped on her right cheek, where was now skull. She replace her mother in job, which was a curse, still a blessing. There she was seeking for peaces untile her daughter comes.
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Sabriel was screaming. She spouts to reach the last level to her peace. Now, she’ll have to leave her home, temple of fighters and soul keepers. She was in pain. Her mother said that this will happen. Her powers were coming to her. Skills, beauty and intelligence from her and ancestors were coming to her. She lost balance and in front of her eyes came dark. And she saw her. Crystal. Her mother and what she became.
‘’ Come. Here will be an hour. There a minute. It’s time that I pass our….duty…our curse…our blessing.’’
This was the most terrifying moment for Sabriel. She was scared as never. Souls which cannot leave were around her and her mother was…..

This is great!

I can't wait for the next chapter!!

Shadow song...!!! That was beautiful !!! Please plese come back and continue the story...!!

It seemed a bit choppy, but you're on the right track.

Well I could never right something that good- let alone in another language like she did!

Nothing special. I tryed with poem/story, but it didn't came out as I thought it will. Enjoy in new chapter!

[size=12]Chapter two- separated souls[/size]

Sometime Grena wished to control time. She didn’t have regrets, but there was something…better saying someone, which was missed more than anything. And nothing could replace her. There used to be song for them. But then, they replace it. Grena was in a village pub. She hated the song, which bartender stimulates others to sing. They never saw her neither her sister. Some drunken old geezer started to sing.

‘’Porcelain face,
Lips like strawberry marmalade
Eyes like clouds on sky,
Both with thoughts way up high.
Only three things make them different.
One is named Grena,
Other was named Elaine.
Grena had hair like night
Elaine white as snow,
One is dead
One alive
And here’s the story
On which the king is so proud.’’

He waited that disapproval to king calmed down. Grena tried to be seen cheerful, but deep in side…fire of revenge was joust getting stronger, hotter and anger with it…witch or not, she needed someone who would help her get revenged. Person with hood was observing her… and it was something in the person that made it different from others. Grena ignored her sentences, which were screaming that something is very wrong.

‘’One was gentle, soft,
Her kindest made fall in love,
Other could kill foes
Before you can touch your nose!
No worries she never did.
That night her parents were away,
On a walk they said.
Truth it was,
That in ambush in night
On they’re necks was blood.
Twins were five back then,
Then they fulfilled 16…
Age of decisions we can say.
King knew how powerful
The twins are,
So he ordered
To get them
And kill, like parents.
They say that he ordered
To make their death long
More suffering,
More blood!
Some quote. ‘’

Whispering among the public speeded to her corner.

‘’They whispered that one is still alive,
that king wants her on her side!
Fool I say.
So where was I?
Bartender more!
16 they were, yes.
In middle of ceremony,
The assassin- only one!’’

Laugh from his audience, even from Grena. Assassin can kill a wizard, maybe sorcerer, but whit much difficulty. Twins which were linked and sorcerers? She pressed her hand.

‘’He tried to kill them both!
Oh, what a sword!
Grena was fighting,
Trying killing,
But gentle soul
Elaine couldn’t see this.
She tried to stop them.
Perhaps she was too nice,
Perhaps she had too big heart
For this world…
Assassin didn’t heard a word,
Quickly he pushed his sword,
Through her virgin body.
Grena felt pain too,
You know.
Linked twins,
Her hair change to furies red!
And she damaged assassin
With magic really bad.
A scar they both have.
Assassin on his chest.
Grena is marked,
Forever with scar
From her eye
To her now splinted lips.
They said she berried sister body
In a tomb
Of white marble and diamonds!
We don’t know that.
It is told that her scream
Of sorrow and pain
Is heard even now
When she’s far away,
Seeking revenge.
We know she cried only once,
At her sister grave.
Only that time,
And never more,
She let clouds in her eyes
Rain. Her hair are back to black.
Tears. Only that time.
And. Never. More.’’

He finished. Grena knew they were wrong. She cried every night, until an owl came to her. She touched her boo staff on her back. Magic boo (?) staff. Anything more ridiculous she once said to her sister. Now she’s having it with pride. King’s elite guard came from nowhere.
‘’Grena! Kings order is to join him. Or you’ll burn as a witch in middle age!’’
‘’Fulls you are.’’ All ran away. Accept person from corner, which was getting closer to Grena. The person was a girl she saw. And she grabbed from the back.
‘’Now is not the time, not even the place right!’’ she said. And they disappear in front of Elite Guard.
‘’King won’t like this.’’
‘’Does he ever? Here goes my home!’’
‘’And one of my daughters!’’ they complained, as they walked back to black castle to report.
Meanwhile around Grena and girl time passed backward! She felt sick and dizzy and all was black & white. When it stopped spinning all around her she feel. Around her was forest and hill was green.
‘’Who…what are you!’’ she asked the girl.
‘’For name I can tell you I’m Nia. For what I am…half human, half something which you can’t know…yet. And with proud I say…I am one and last one. Time traveler.’’

As I said...nothing special. Joust write that you read it...still reviews are welcom!

their both really good
out of curiosity did you get the name sabriel from the books by garth Nix?
They are very good
anyway their good

i love it very nice

Yup. Sabriel by Garth Nix. It kinda fit in. I'm trying to get Lirael and Abhorsen but I can't get them. Net order!
Third chapter will be posted next week. If I finish cleaning my room, purhaps sooner. But by the mess which is there

Þú ættir að verða rithöfundur

excuse you?

Very good Shadowsong. Has a really deep feeling into it.

upps sry... u shoud become a reater

Chapter 3: Through time

‘’Yeah and I never had a sister.’’ Sarcastically said Grena.
‘’But she suppose…oh, joust great.’’ She was now in rather bad mood. O.k. she saved her, but…was hard to expect some gratitude?
‘’Who suppose to do what?’’
‘’If she didn’t told you that, then either won’t I, At least not yet.’’ Nia decided that this isn’t the right time.
‘’Great I’m with a loony tic which doesn’t want to tell me about something which I should known.’’ Grena started to walk away.
‘’Fine. Use the staff if you don’t believe me. And try to do something on that white rose next to you.’’ Nia knew what she was doing. She always did. It was her Natural ability that came along with her power. Grena sighed. She whispered few words for spell of protection.
**‘’ Tru im u’l er pet aor o’w.’’ she whispered and touched rose with her staff. Nothing. Staff didn’t work, neither her magic.
‘’I don’t…’’
‘Things which aren’t made cannot work. This is time before your staff and us. Magic exist BUT you used your staff as a catalisator of your magic.’’
‘’Then you do travel…’’ Nia nod.
‘’Then you can help me save my sister!’’ Grena was exited. Hope was back in her, but a simple shook with head crushed that hope.
‘’I cannot interfere in time. Many think that talking is that, but it isn’t.’’ Grena’s look was icy. She went to her and with one hand she grabbed her neck.
‘’No…you will help me.’’ Nia was chocking, but instead of fighting she touched Grena on place where her scar started. She also covered her eyes. Next moment was full of confusion. In a single second Grena saw many possibility of ending. In each one Elaine died. In each one on more cruel way and not a single one had a chance to save her sister. Grena’s hand was shaking and her grasp was abating. It didn’t last long before Grena was on her knees crying and shaking. Nia took a deep breath. She didn’t look down and her eyes were closed. Then she carefully touched Grena’s shoulder. Before Grena had control over her feelings, sun was already saying goodbye and first stars were already there, for those, which could see them.
‘’I’m…sorry.’’ Grena Apologized to Nia, which already forgive her.
‘’Shh. I could see that coming. Now…let’s go back. Guard should be away by now…I’m feeling sorry for them’’
‘’Why? They would kill us both…and they claim that they’re under protection of golden dragon!’’
‘’Yes, they would kill us. But if they wouldn’t they’re family’s would die. It’s not their fault that they have to serve Scáthach. Now we must find other.’’
‘’But they could…wait did you say others?’’
‘’Did you thought that only us two could resist the king?’’
‘’But…’’
‘’You wanted a revenge, didn’t you. My job is to prevent that what he is going to do.’’
‘’And you won’t tell me.’’
‘’Not yet. C’ mon. We need to get in city before other two. And don’t forget to call Fionúir… she is your owl?''
''How do you know for…never mind.’’
''You at least know that she'll come. Meanwhile Sheridan is still hunting.''
''And who is he?''
''You'll see. Let's go! I don't want to be late…Sabriel is already there.'' Grena sighed. This meant a long journey. And it also meant more secrets. Meanwhile Nia was trying to be quiet about future. Black and white color surrounded them and they were on same place as before. Only time was different.
‘’Part of your magic worked.’’ Pointed out Nia. Grena smiled. She didn’t notice that village pub has a protecting sign. White rose.

Tru im u’l er pet aor o’w.
Through time you’ll be here, pretty as you are now.


Nothing special. I joust figure out that I haven't write this for a long time.