this is a little bit of something big i'm trying to write

The knife
Ayra

I entered the room as quietly as I could. Many people would have used the phrase as quiet as a mouse, but I’d never believed in that phrase, for one simple reason, mice aren’t quiet.

Then I saw the knife, I’d seen it in my dreams since I was 5 in my old world, I picked it up gently and felt a great burden fall on my shoulders. I knew its purpose, to kill one of the contenders for the throne.
I was one of the contenders for the throne. It was either me or the killers of my family; I imagined them all peering over me the knife to my throat.

Adrian can have my throne, it was my unwanted birthright, and my mother knew it from the minute I was born. I either killed myself now or proclaimed myself queen. Tensions were running high in the camp, I could help them, but I would need respect, and for that I would need to hold a stronger shield over my mind. I knew the way, it was what I was born to do, but could I hold true? Could I fight for what I didn’t believe in?

I held the knife to my throat; it would be so easy to end my life, so easy to give evil the throne. I thought of Myriah, she would care about my passing, it would pain her, it would break Nicodemus’s heart; destroy his dreams of a peaceful world. It would be the cowardly to quit. Yet brave to take the step no honourable queen would take. But would it be right?

Then my mind turned to Adrian and I felt a great pain, he thought he could do better, but his power had only begun to form and he knew nothing of mine. I couldn’t kill him; but he might try to kill me.

My feelings for Adrian were so… strange. They were messy and I didn’t like it. I liked to know everything about my situation. I liked to know and to see the amazement cross those who had been confused. I new about the enemy and their coal black hearts. There style so obviously evil. But Adrian though attacking my authority was not; in his heart cruel or evil. So I decided to focus on the most organised thought I had to do with him. If I died, he would soon follow.

Then I thought of what I had to gain. I wanted revenge. They killed my family. They killed my brothers. They killed my sisters. They killed my mother. They killed my father. They were poisoning my country. They stole everything fro me. and now they were trying to steal the one thing that stopped me returning to my eight siblings; to my ignorant mother and to my uncaring father. My throne.

This anger began to consume me. But was quelled for my longing. It was pulling me away from this world. I was longing for death’s cold embrace; but would it even work? What was the name of that witch? She would never let me die! Not if I killed myself a thousand times over. She’d bring me back again and again to face my destiny; even if it killed her… maybe I should summon her and show my royal blood! It would work. All mortal men fear her but she always had a soft spot for me… No-one knew why. Now I do, she knew I was the heir to the throne, she told me once in a dream, but I was too young to understand; Gadriel that was her name. suddenly my plan formed in front of my eyes, the council of good witches would heed my call as well, the eagles, the wolves, the seers. Then the most powerful of forces came to me; the only true way to get the soldiers eternal loyalty; the four defenders, Sabriel, Geraden, Lireal, and Nathanial, the real protectors. No-one knew what race to call them, only that they could not be properly killed until the last possible heir to the throne died.

I looked at the knife longingly; it was an experience I had felt for many things, I’d always pushed it aside before... I stiffened; I wasn’t alone anymore, Adrian had opened the door and I still had the knife to my throat.

As soon as saw me he froze. “What are you doing?” he asked in the cruellest and harshest voice he could. It wasn’t his voice. People were making him do this; he’s not such a free spirit after all.
“You can’t be so foolish to think you can rule us or live on in death. Stop acting in such a childish way. Put the knife down and come outside. Put me in charge and then you don’t have to die.”

That did it; the voice was so cruel, harsh and…Stupid. I told him so in the angriest voice I could muster from my soul, but to start off with, I laughed at him. Which hit him harder, I did not know.

I put the knife down and began a speech that would go down in history, simply because it was my confession to my world and all could hear it throughout the land.

“You are the only one being childish, you’ve just said farewell to your chance for the throne. I am the true ruler of this land; I am the heir to the throne. So in answer to your question, I do believe I can rule this world because it was what I was born to do. Your position is that of an opposing lord with no chance of victory.

“My mother knew this day would come. That is why she left the dagger here; to show me my place once and for all.

“I have to thank you though; if you hadn’t come in seeking to destroy me, I might have just slit my throat in preference to taking the throne and calling up the people who can save us. I am not a fool, and you should stop letting those people control you, now if you’ll excuse me I have a summoning to do”

“Are you crazy that will let the enemy know where we are” he said using his own voice.
“I am the only reason they haven’t found us already, and if my plan works we’ll be hidden in the forest before they get here. Now you have a choice, you can stand by my side or fall to my magic.”

“You have magic but that’s impossible? Someone would have sensed it by now.” He said stupidly. He was confused I wasn’t going to delay. Time was short. Work had to be done.

“Everyone with royal blood has powerful magic and in difficult times goddesses are made. Anyone can hide magic and the inexperienced magicians you know of are far too weak to stop me.

“Now I must ask. Will you follow me through these difficult times and stay beside not in front?”

“I swear on my honour that I will”

if you manage to finish reading it without falling asleep please comment

It's good. Will you read mine. Fire and Ice.

thanks it's one of my best chapters so far
i want to write a story
if i finish it'll be called utopia

Cool. I hope you like mine. It's the best story I have written so far.

OKAY! NO TRIPLE POSTING DARNIT!

Oh, that is Glenwing. Don't get on his bad side. I haven't, that I know of. It's just not wise.


Do you have a name for your story?

Some advice- Third person and past tense is best to write in.
That was a bit too much speech, some more discriptions of feelings, emotions, sights, reactions, movements etc.

thank you

I was about to knock on the door but on old lady had already opened it. She smiled down at us and said “you must be Ayra’s new friends, Adrian and Myriah. My you have grown exactly as predicted. Such a shame it all had to begin so soon. It can’t be helped, do come in Ayra will be here soon”
“Hi” I said
“Nice dress, where did you get it?” Ayra asked
“I inherited it from someone” replied Myriah
“I got mine from my grandma, seems quite appropriate now” said Ayra
“Why are you wearing a tiara?” I asked
“Grandma told me to” she replied
“And the pearls?” I asked
“Ditto” she answered
Myriah shivered and Ayra looked relieved, she welcomed us inside and took us to her room.
“I’ve got the fire going and here are your beds, now one question, it’s quite important, do you snore?” Ayra asked
“No” we said at the exact same time
“That’s good, neither do I” she said and smiled
“Hey Ayra” said a strange teenager as he entered the room
“Hi Dave what’s wrong?” Ayra asked
“I came to see these friends you invited over” he replied. He was eyeing both of us suspiciously. I shivered Ayra’s family was intimidating. I looked at my sister, she smiled at Dave blind to his scrutiny and all that was strange in this house; the fact that there were older books in this room than in our old library; the fact that no matter how hard I looked I could see no dust; the fact that Ayra looked at Dave as if he were her father; and strangest of all that everything in this room was glowing bright when she faced it, all that she had her back to was dark but when she turned it went bright. I could have almost have believed it glowed for her looking its best for her eye to delight in. suddenly I wanted to run away, I was scared everything was unreal but in her own way Ayra had trapped me in her home, I had no escape.
“oh, yeah, may I formally introduce lady Myriah and her twin brother Adrian, both shall be staying in our formal residence for the night” Ayra announced sounding very posh but most startling of all, realistic. And then they both started laughing, in the short time I’d known her she had barely smiled; i felt happy when she laughed, and though it must have been my imagination I thought I heard the fire giggle in a sweet tingling voice.
Having finished his scrutiny and appearing satisfied Dave said what he had to say “Well, its 5 o’clock, dinner will be around 6, now come on Ayra give me a hug” he asked. She excitedly did so, I watched him spin her round and round like life wouldn’t be complete without her. I remembered that being done to me, it stopped when I was seven.
I could see that Ayra still enjoyed every minute of it. This may sound to think that I was shocked to see a nine year old by hugged in that way by her big brother; but I was, Ayra just seemed so much older.
“Now come on turn out your pockets I don’t think you’ve brought ordinary sleepover equipment” Ayra asked
“How did you know?” we asked
“That’s my little secret. Now explain the Swiss army knife”
“Well, I don’t know” I was embarrassed to be coaxed int replying by her smile


“Well that’s the easy stuff out the way, I’ve got some thing I want to show you” she walked over to a cupboard and came out holding something that looked like a crystal ball.
“What is that? It’s so shiny” Myriah asked
“That’s my secret, but I must ask what do you see in its surface?” Ayra asked
“We kind of came to get rid of the secrets” I said
That was when she turned to me and stood up, she looked quite threatening in her crown and I swallowed.
“It isn’t exactly fair, you’ve got a night worth of memories, I have 11 years worth telling, and you will just have to learn how to appreciate that”
I turned to look at Myriah; Ayra had somehow reached her before my eyes. She already had a flannel on Myriah’s head.
“Myriah can you hear me?” she asked
“Yes, just about” Myriah replied her voice was faint she was sweating and tears boiling to the touch were dripping down her rosy cheeks. Fury consumed me what was Ayra doing to my younger sister?
“What did you see?” she asked nervously
“Autumn leaves, a crown, a staff, the crown breaks as a man and woman scream, 3 lights disappear, fire burns, evil laughter, to remain for ever after” then Myriah fainted unable to say anymore
“The past is a horrendous thing, let the queens riddle begin” Ayra finished.



“What have you done to her?” I asked I was furious
She turned away and threw the ball at me. I held it in my hands but refused to look.
“Look in its surface, I will explain later” she said, I was defiant but couldn’t refuse her altogether. I meant to look down then up as quick as possible but then I saw something moving in the crystal. I stared harder it was swirling round and round a ballerina, then next to it appeared a little girl swirling round and round; the music, it was beautiful, I felt Ayra kneel beside me and touch the crystal. A room came into view, the ballerina was part of a music box, the little girl was a girl who looked a little like Ayra, and a woman was cradling a baby. An older girl kneeled before the lady.
“Your highness, you must announce your heir, it will bring hope to the kingdom and we need as much as we can get” the kneeling girl pleaded
“You don’t understand” the queen stated calmly
“Understand what?”
“The heir to the throne is the child I hold in my arms” the queen announced calmly though she couldn’t completely hide her pain.
“But that is impossible the heir has been a boy for a thousand years. David is the heir my queen. Even the witches do not dare oppose him. All can see the magic in his veins”
“He shall be spared by an ancient wizard who predicted our doom. Him, this child as well as the twins of the lords”
There was silence until a slave entered the room
“My master and his companions have come to see the queen”
“You branded yourself didn’t you?”
“Of course my lady; he refused to accept me as his slave so I did it myself, I made him take me”
“Thank you; now please show me to our guests”
“As you wish your highness”


I woke up with a start with Myriah holding my hand. She smiled at me, back to her old self Ayra was on the bed, and the ball was in her hands.
“he is coming” she screamed and then she was flat on the bed bright tears multicoloured shining like rainbows poured off her face onto the bed. And to my shock the bed lifted off the floor and swirled around and around. Fire