Prologue
In the year twenty five hundred earth population reached one hundred billion and every inch of land sea and sky that could be spared and then some was used. humanity had jumped each and every hurdle it had come to war propaganda famine disease drought global warming and cooling all beat down by the human race and such is the way of things when humanity could not be broken they carried on growing unchecked. During this time the academic community decide earth was too small and half of the scientific community was set the task of finding ways off this world and to live on the next and in some of the greatest feats in history were carried out by the year 2542 they perfected terraforming and reincarnated the space programme to more then its former glory. By the year 2992 all planets and moons had been terraformed with a billion or more people on them in the new millennium of 3000 the UnitedPlanets (U.P) formed there mission to expand the great glory of humanity and its technology.
In the year 3422 U.P detected a solar system they nicknamed Loki for each day it was observed it changed and deceived such as the nature of the ancient god. Four colony ships were commissioned to traverse the 22 light years from sol to the Loki system. Each ship represents the four types of government that had weathered the years. First was the academic republic based around a scientific and mathematical approach to any scenario with some humanitarian overtones they are spearhead by the calm and tactical Steven Biel who is believed to be a descendent of ancient Britain his origins are unknown but it is speculated he us to live on earth. Second is the legion led by Demetri believed to be a descendent of ancient Russia but his actual places of origin are unknown. Thirdly the socialist collective who believe that they can only work properly together as a well oiled machine they are led by Joana she has only one link to the past and that is she gained a name for herself inventing the long range teleporter. Finally the regenerative democracy essentially believe that every one needs there own freedom but the they have to work peacefully in unity towards there goal they are led by Li tang who is believed to be descended from ancient china but like his other colony leader comrades his origins are unknown.

Speeding through the void the U.P colony ships made there long voyage in the velvety blackness. They cut through the blackness like rain burrows through the cliff surface slow methodical but with all intent to reach its destination.
The ships were a shaped like things pulled out of a children’s play set and only the inhabitants new that each shape represent a collective party of humanity. After there shape they were all identical jet black with a blue green sphere of the side.
Inside you mighty expect a busy and extremely active society on board but that would be wrong for only a crew of ten robots kept the ships ticking while all the inhabitants lay in a semi chemically induced hibernation only awaking every 10 years to walk around the activity area and talk to each other. Your may wonder why but if you had gone through a straight hundred years of hibernation you will know it would have helped your sanity stay intact.
The first thought is thank the stars were still alive and you have no idea how much comfort can be draw from that one conclusion. The crew then is medically checked by a series of bio-scans and they are released to start what ever recreation they wish and for many it is to unite with their family and spend those precious hour enjoying each others company. All too soon this ends and everyone is filed back to the hibernation chambers to begin the long sleep for another decade.
But now the time is near they have enter the Loki system and each ship lines up to descend to the surface of Delling a planet that was thought one in a million for it was in the comfort zone for life. They fell into planet with the wondering grace of a comet. They were head for what believed to be the four biggest contents. The sphere landed on an eastern content like a tear rolling down a cheek to fall to the ground. To the west the cube landed in a plain framed by mountains and forests. Towards southern content the triangular ship landed in a dusty red land with small pockets of scrub and but one defining feature a great plateau that seemed it could have held all the life on the planet. The rectangle settled in a russet red forest with all the grace its encumbered forum would allow. The pentagon should have land in the north but it crashed into the equatorial sea or that’s what the others thought.
And once again the Loki system was still all nineteen planets orbiting their binary stars nicknamed Odin and Thor by the earth people. The Loki system was completely silent just moving around Odin and Thor as steadily as the universe expands ever moving never ceasing for to stop is to let the void win and that can’t happen at least not quite yet.

One major tip I can give you:

No matter how good a story you have, no matter how great the idea is, if no one can read it, then what's the point in writing it?

I'm sure you have a great story, and by posting it here, you clearly want it to be read, but reading through one page of unparagraphed and badly punctuated text isn't most peoples idea of a good time.

I noticed some sentences that went over two lines without punctuation. Edit it putting in more commas and paragraphing it better, and maybe people like myself won't get lost in it.

I hope I don't appear to be too harsh, chances are you have a great story, just try to make it easier for people to read it.

well i've found that people don't mind to much apart from really nasty people that wouldn't recognise a good peice of writing if it hit them in the face. thanks for the critism but just one tip for you when your giving constructive critism to people you shouldn't just try and breaking down everything they have put alot of effort into.

Ok, the only main point I gave you there was to paragraph better. Reading on a computer strains peoples eyes a lot more than reading from a book. Paragraphing makes it easier for people to read, and more people will enjoy your book if you paragraph it better.

As for my level of critique: I'll keep that in mind when I'm critiquing your story. I give the same basic level of critique to everyone, but since you find it too harsh, I'll tone it down.

As well as that, I didn't criticise your story, only the way it was presented.

about the presention I have this kind of dyslexia and fairly bad at spelling and grammar, also i get these like creative rushes and i just steam on ahead

Ah, in that case I understand. If you PM me it, then I'll paragraph it for you, and maybe clear up some of the spelling and grammar.

Sorry, again for the harsh critique... but on my writers forum, I know a few who would tear you to pieces!